So I’m almost finished with my second week of grad school, I’m overwhelmed & stressed & confused — but I haven’t been this motivated in a really long time. And it feels really good to be on a track again that I feel like I can accomplish & be really good at. I’m happy for the first time in a long time. There’s a few outside factors I need to also take care of but I’m getting a helluva lot stronger mentally because of this program and I’m focusing on making sure I’m the best I can be.
Which brings me to the song Sunscreen by Ira Wolf, which I just discovered on Spotify! Maybe it’s the PMS or maybe it’s the sleep debt but this song hit so many nails on the head that I think I’ve either cried or teared up every time I’ve listened so far. It’s basically a love song to nobody but about what the person is looking for in a partner.
If you know me in real life, you probably know I’m stubborn, in my own head, and I get overwhelmed by perfectionism so this song is me. Before I met my current boyfriend, I always assumed I’d become an old maid because I hadn’t found a partner that not only accepted my flaws & understood my nuances but also pushed me to be better than I was before on my own terms. Which is something my current partner does incredibly well without hopefully sacrificing himself too much.
This song is a constant hit in the feels and addresses some of my significant insecurities when it comes to relationships, whether it be romantic or plutonic. I’m sure lots of people can relate to the sentiment because love is terrifyingly nauseating but it somehow keeps you wanting more and more.
Favourite lyrics: I want someone/Who can ground me when I’m too high/Light up the dark side of my head/I want someone/To share my coffee and sunscreen/ My mornings, my stories, and my bed
So I’ll end with this. Finding your person takes time and it takes work. It takes effort and it’s not always sunshine, roses, and beach hair — some days you’ll both be a hot mess and want to fight more than make up. But somehow, from what I’ve heard, that person keeps you coming back.
Take care of yourselves, everyone. You’re the only one you’ve got.